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Zen-Like Secret to Get Anything You Want

Most of depression comes from physiological issues that you can correct.  Other aspects of depression can be solved with the correct sleep, relaxation, food, vitamins, and exercise.  On top of that, we need people that support us.

One aspect that always gave me a hard time was not making enough money.  This is a post about how my thoughts evolved over time on how to actually provide value to the world (and thus make money).

Secret to Get Anything You Want?

I didn’t believe it either. I always knew of the principle through certain religious and spiritual traditions, but never really believed it. If you do it simply to get what you want, it doesn’t work. Paradoxically, it has to be done in an almost zen-like state where you do it simply to do it, not for any other purpose.

I thought that I had to go balls to the wall for my own sake to get anywhere close to put me in the position where I could actually do it. It had to be about me until I had success, then I could give back.

It wasn’t until the 12th book that I read that mentioned it that I realized how powerful it must be. I found it in all the books about millionaires, the people who supposedly have no soul and are “greedy.”

What is the secret?

To Get What You Want, Give It

Give: to present voluntarily and without expecting compensation

Whatever your goal is, there is one thing that will always bring you to success. Giving value.

Success is becoming the person you need to be. You can’t make a million dollars until you become the person that produces a million dollars worth of value.

I hate to admit, but I thought that I had to be ruthlessly selfish to become a successful entrepreneur/business owner.

I decided to train myself to become a giving person instead and all sorts of amazing things have happened.

For one, it just feels damn good to do it.

I had a recent problem with an order from Amazon.com and had to chat with a customer representative. She was awesome. I received an email asking for feedback. As I was about to delete it, I grinned and sent this:

Sydney was amazing. I closed two chat windows previous to talking with Sydney because the others took too long, asked questions I had already answered, and didn’t seem to be getting anywhere.

When I opened the new chat window, I was surprised when Sydney communicated very clearly and got right to the core of the issue. She explained Amazon would refund my order, to which I replied that if I had too that would work, but I really wanted the product because I had free shipping on it.

She replied with this,
“I do understand where you are coming from, however, I do apologize because your item is sold by a seller and fulfilled by Amazon and because the seller’s inventory is constantly changing, we’re not be able to send a replacement but we may only be able to process a refund for this order. But as an exception for you,
when you re-order these items on the website, after the refund has been issued, we will give you free upgraded shipping for your item.
Would that work for you?”

I would never expect such a clearly written response that completely solved the need I was asking for. She demonstrated she understood, explained the situation from her side, then showed me how we could still give me a refund AND get the shipping that I wanted.

She literally solved my problem in a short amount of time, showed empathy towards my concern, and sent me on my way in a kind and timely matter.

Sydney is a great customer service representative and I believe she is a strong asset to your team.

Sincerely,
TJ

I got a sick (healthy?) pleasure out of sending that message, and I felt great for the rest of the day. There is no way that that message would ever benefit me directly.

Becoming a giving person is awesome. Not just because it makes you magnetic to others around you, but it also feels good.

Maybe it is the fact that you radiate more with joy when you give that more positivity will flow into your life. Maybe it is that giving transforms you into a good person that people will trust. All I know is that true giving will benefit your life.

Connecting with Successful People

If you made $200 an hour, received hundreds of emails a day, and saw an email titled “Please Help” that said, “I want to make a million dollars. Tell me how.” Would you even open it?

When you have a million things to do and your niece comes in and asks you to help her cook a meal, you ignore her and tell her you are busy.

Those are perfect examples of people taking value without giving any in return. That is the equivalent of being a black hole of happiness that sucks the life out of everyone around you without dishing out any in return. And we all know that everyone is secretly afraid of black holes.

Let’s say your niece needs you to open up a jar of food and help her cook for 5 minutes. She can either say, “Hey! Help me cook I am hungry!” to which you would close the door and secretly hope it hits her in the face (not really, just using dramatization to keep your attention you asshole) ;).

Or she could say, “Hey I’m cooking some food and would love to make extra for you. You look really busy and I can help you save some time by making you some food and bringing it down to you when it’s ready. Could you come up and open a jar for me real quick and help me get down the pan so I can get started?”

By offering to give first either upfront or after you receive their help, it shows that you value them and aren’t basically trying to rob them of their value.

Whole New World of Possibilities

I had a coworker who had to move into another apartment. She was moving on July 4th and seemed to be in distress.

I offered to help, only because I knew I’d get a sick (healthy?) pleasure from doing it without wanting anything in return.

I woke up early on July 4th and spent half the day helping her. She thanked me profusely afterwards. After hearing about my desire to be an entrepreneur, she then started sharing all her stories about her previous businesses.

She introduced me to her brother who had just moved here from Guatamala because he was making so much money in Guatamala the government hacked his bank account.

Not only did I get my fix for the day of doing a random deed, doors of opportunity opened up that wouldn’t have otherwise.

I took this concept even further to contact a few entrepreneurs I admired. Instead of simply emailing them and trying to get something from them, I offered to work for free.

One responded to my email, thanked me for my appreciation and offered me a project. I took it and he said that if my work saves him time, he will offer me mentoring.

Mentoring from someone who has done exactly what I want to do is invaluable.

There was another entrepreneur who I knew I couldn’t really offer any work, so instead I offered appreciation and evidence that I took his advice and applied it. I told him how much I admired his work and told him specific examples of how I implemented it.

He told me that I can now send him any idea that I have and he will personally respond with whether or not the idea has potential to make money in the long run.

Simply by giving true appreciation, I now can ask someone who was in my same shoes and who’s business is now on the track to making a few million dollars a year whether or not my idea is good before I pour hours of time into it.

The Giving Paradox

Being a giving person makes life so much more enjoyable. Giving by definition implies that you are losing something by placing it in the hands of others. However, instead of being in your head and wallowing in self pity and selfishness, you get to experience the joy of spreading joy. Not only that, but paradoxically you will start getting what you want.

In reality, most of it isn’t a paradox. People will give you what you want if you give them what they want. You can’t find a girlfriend by trying to act cool and relying on her to make you happy. You can only find a girlfriend and get what you want by giving her what she wants, whether that’s excitement or a cute lil cuddle buddy to watch movies with.

That business mentor doesn’t want to be bothered by giving advice to someone he doesn’t know. What he wants is to help someone who he personally connects with, who he can tell has read his stuff and executed, and who is willing to actually apply and do what he suggests.

It is the perfect example of win-win. Life becomes a journey of receiving and giving, every party always winning, and moving forward everyday.

If you want love, give love. If you want help with entrepreneurship, help out a successful entrepreneur.

It’s that simple.

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How I Defeated the Onset of Illness in One Hour

Would you be willing to spend one hour in order to save yourself from being sick for an entire week? What if I told you it also is extremely cheap?

For the past few weeks I’ve been doing nothing but exercising, working, searching for a place to live, dealing with medical bills, etc. all while being sleep deprived. Yesterday I bought some green chard that looked like it was a little old, but decided to try eating it anyway. Bad Idea. I was already fatigued and drained and the rotten vegetable proved to be the tipping point for my immune system. For the rest of the day I felt gross.

I woke up the following day and with the way that I felt I knew a sickness was about to dominate and overtake me. I worked, then worked out while sick (legs of all things) then traveled left and right looking for a place to live. A blanket of fatigue and unhappiness began to wrap itself around me and I felt its impending doom. Then I remembered this giant book of Chinese Medicine I had bought and decided it couldn’t hurt to try it and see for myself if it worked.

Digging through it, I tried the formula. It worked.

UPDATE: I still do this all the time when I start to get sick.

Tea, Cayenne, Ginger, Garlic and Hot Showers

While heating up a cup of water, I cut up fresh ginger (it has to be fresh ginger) and grabbed some cayenne and chamomile tea. I drank two glasses of this concoction.

This alone is enough to get you hot and sweaty, however the book takes it one step further.

You then peel a raw, fresh garlic clove (not garlic powder) and suck on the garlic without chewing.

After consuming your tea and sucking on the raw garlic, you take a hot shower to sweat and open up your pores. I also took a niacin (vitamin B-3) which causes your capillaries to open and blood to flow towards the skin.

My whole body was revved up and hot. I was sweating even in my room which was 67 degrees. Before I knew it I had a ton of energy. In fact, I had so much energy I started working out again (I did the ab workout I was too tired to do at the end of my leg workout earlier). After working out I finished an entire financial application, cleaned my room, prepared my hockey equipment to sell, and prepared everything I needed for the next day all under a few hours. I woke up the next day energized and determined.

So the next time you are getting sick, try this out.

Step-By-Step Process of Dominating the Onset of Illness

• Step 1: Drink hot tea, I prefer chamomile.
• Optional (TJ’s Step): Take a niacin while drinking your hot tea to further open up your pores and aid in elimination. You want regular niacin (not flush free or delayed release) – the kind that will make you “flush” and open up your capillaries.  I personally used Twinlabs Niacin which is under $9.00 with free shipping.
• Step 2: Peel and cut up fresh ginger and add this to your hot tea with cayenne pepper (add as much cayenne as you can handle).
• Step 3: After drinking a few cups (keeping it hot), peel fresh garlic. Suck on the pieces without chewing for 15 minutes.
• Step 4: Take a hot shower (I took mine while sucking on the garlic).

Your body should now be internally hot, sweating out the bad bacteria, and surging with the immune boosting effects of garlic. If you do this early enough when you are catching yourself getting sick, you just might prevent a week of misery.

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5 Common Myths of Depression Debunked

Topics Discussed

0:08 – 1st Myth – Depression is a Disease
1:11 – Having depression for life?
1:20 – 2nd Myth – Depressed People Have Low Willpower
2:12 – How to Describe Depression to a Person
2:41 – Depression Robs you of Willpower
3:28 – 3rd Myth – All You Need is a Pill
4:16 – Does Paxil Cure Vitamin D Deficiency?
4:40 – Antidepressants are a Bigger Decision Than We Think
5:12 – 4th Myth – Labeling it as Depression will Help You
5:40 – Does Feeling Bad Mean You are Getting Depressed?
6:59 – 5th Myth – You Just Need to Meditate/Pray
7:57 – Spiritual Practice is Good, But Still Conquer The Root Cause of Depression

It is a “Disease”

Depression is NOT a disease.  It is a condition. A sign that you need a change. It CAN improve, you CAN reduce relapses, you CAN get better. I was depressed for 11 years! I still experience some deep sadness, but never to the point where I become unable to function for weeks at a time like I used to.

There are so many causes for depression it is mind blowing. Start attacking those first before you label yourself with a disease.

Here are just a few things off the top of my head that can cause depression:

• Sleep Deprivation
• Poor Nutrition
• Digestion Problems
• Low Testosterone
• Thyroid Issues
• Lack of Exercise
• Lack of Meaningful Relationships
• Trauma
• Grief
• Side Effects from Medications
• Stressful Life Events
• Faulty Mood Regulation by the Brain
• Negative Downward Spiral of Thoughts
• Stress

Even if your depression is a chemical imbalance in your brain unrelated to any other areas of your body, hormones, etc. it can still be solved with the right medications.

Depression is tricky because once you are “there” it warps your thoughts to make you think that it cannot be solved. You think it is there “for life” and you are screwed.

I’m not going to spend my life being depressed and neither are you. However, when you try something and think you’ve found the answer, only to crash a few weeks later, over and over again, it is easy to start to believe those thoughts.

I believed them for many years. It is scary to think how close and how much I thought about ending my life during those times. In reality, it likely could have happened. Sometimes I’m not quite sure why it didn’t.

I know if you are depressed and reading this it won’t quite register. That’s okay. Keep pushing forwards, try to regain any possible hope that you have, ask for help, and do whatever it takes to find what you need.

One person may need medication, another may need to adjust their nutrition, another may need to learn to relax and bring down the stress. Others, like me, may need a combination of proper nutrition, exercise, sunlight, relaxation, 8+ hours of sleep every night, healthy relationships, awareness of negative thought patterns, a deeper purpose, ability to express oneself, and a few supplements.

If you still want to believe it is a disease, at least know that it can be cured.

Depressed People Have Low Willpower

Although depression isn’t a “disease,” it is still a very real condition.

People who say that you need to “shake it off” or “snap out of it” either have never actually known someone closely with depression or have never come close to experiencing it themselves.

You can’t blame them for thinking that. When they hear you say you are depressed they hear “I am feeling a little down today” when in reality what you said was, “I’ve wanted to blow my head off for the past 2 weeks but don’t even have enough energy to do that.”

If you have never experienced depression your reality may not be able to stretch far enough to understand. That’s understandable too.

I went skydiving when I was depressed and felt nothing. I landed and didn’t even care. On the drive home I was still miserable. For my friend, that was probably the biggest buzz kill he had ever experienced in his life to drive home with someone after skydiving that didn’t even get stimulation from falling through the sky.

Depression robs you of all your energy. It’s hard to have any willpower left when you had to use it all just to get over the pain of putting your clothes on and the anxiety of talking to the cashier to buy your food.

If you have depression, you need to stop being so hard on yourself. It is okay. You are not a bad person, you just are. Depression does not mean you are weak. If anything, if you come out of depression, you are stronger than the average person who never had to.

When you finally attack that depression, overcome it, and start to relax on the other side you will have an experience that most people will never be able to touch. You will appreciate and understand just how temporary and beautiful this life is because it could always be worse with depression.

Yes, ultimately you are responsible for the quality of your life, but if you are depressed it’s important to accept that it isn’t because of some moral flaw. You need rest, sleep, food, healthy people and time to allow your brain to heal. You need support, professional help, etc.

Depression can grab a hold of you by making you feel terrible and keep you feeling terrible by you believing you are a bad person for feeling terrible. Depression’s great complexity comes from the fact that it reinforces itself.

You feel bad, so you start to feel bad that you feel bad, causing you to feel worse.

It’s a trap and hard to get out of. Sometimes reality becomes warped. Thoughts you have while depressed are not real and do not reflect what is really going on.

You are not a bad person with low willpower when you don’t enjoy being with your family or kids anymore. You have a condition causing you to feel that way and there are certain treatments that can help.

All You Need is a Pill to Feel Better

Again, there is so many causes for depression. Being born prozac deficient doesn’t seem to be one of them, but if you’ve tried everything and an antidepressant works for you long-term, I’m not recommending against it. I’m just saying you should still consider the other options.

Giving someone Paxil when they sleep 3 hours a night, eat at McDeath 4x a day, cram themselves full of ice cream and hang out with toxic people everyday, is counterproductive.

Yes, you CAN have a chemical deficiency. But even if you are taking an antidepressant I would strongly recommend working on areas of your life such as physical health, relationships, etc. while on it.

If you take care of yourself, get enough sleep, like your job/business, have great friends and live a good life yet STILL feel depressed, antidepressants might be your ticket. This is when a pill is really all you need to feel better.

If you eat junk food all day, stay up till 2am and work at a job you hate at 6am for 12 hours everyday, an antidepressant isn’t going to be your long-term solution.

It’s important to realize that an antidepressant is a much bigger decision than our society would lead you to believe. I had a hell of a time trying to get off mine.

Antidepressants can help you and may be necessary. But before you take the plunge and start taking a pharmaceutical pill everyday make sure you discuss the side-effects, weigh the long-term consequences and really make sure it is the right decision for you.

Labeling it as “Depression” will Help You

Saying you “have” depression can help if you are in denial of your feelings. However, if you accept the way you feel, it’s best to not think of yourself as having “depression.”

I used to always think to myself, “Uh oh, I’m getting depressed again. I’m screwed. Its going to be a rough ride” and I’d feed the beast. It would lead to a downward spiral of me being so depressed that all I could focus on was being depressed, and focusing so much on being depressed that I was becoming depressed.

It is okay to feel bad. Now, what is causing these feelings? Are you isolated? Lonely? Have you been getting enough sleep? Food? Time with people you love?

I haven’t had a serious relapse of depression in years. Whenever I feel myself slipping, I take a step back and try to really think about what I need in that moment, that my feelings are indicating something such as that I need rest or a fun night out with friends, rather than that I am now becoming depressed and am screwed.

Take the first signs of your mood turning sour as signs that you need to take action (or inaction) in an area of your life. Maybe you just need to sit and be with yourself for a moment. Maybe you need to assert yourself with your friend who was disrespectful to you.

Thinking that you have depression is a great excuse to allow it to overwhelm you. Instead of thinking that depression is this monster that will overwhelm me and take me for a ride and there’s nothing I can do about it, I view it as something happening to me with clues as to what is causing this reaction.

Sometimes this is even a good thing. It wouldn’t help you out if you couldn’t feel physical pain. How would you ever know if your hand was resting on an oven and doing irreversible damage? Physical pain is a sign that you need to make a change to help yourself.

I now view depression in the same way. Maybe I am starting to feel depressed because I am working at the same job that I hate for too long and I am trying to signal to myself it isn’t working. Maybe I’m feeling depressed because I’ve been staying up past 2:00am and waking up at 8:00am every day.

Surely the depression doesn’t feel good, but if the depression is actually telling me to get some sleep, it saves me from being sleep deprived for 10 more years, which could increase the likelihood of me not-dying.

You Just Need to Meditate/Pray

This is another controversial one. I have used meditation to help me tremendously, but it isn’t a cure-all either.

This is tricky because while I want to advocate taking control by taking the action necessary to achieve what you want rather than waiting for someone or something else to do it for you, I do understand that this might have a special place in people’s lives.

Meditation and praying is good, but thinking it will solve everything can lead to more problems. If it doesn’t work, it could cause you to think you are depressed because you are immoral. If you are meditating or praying and still not getting better, does that mean you lack faith? Are you a bad person after all?

I once meditated during an entire summer for 2 hours a day. I did feel great. I did still get depressed.

This can be an important area of your life, but it is important to realize that it is an area of your life.

If you have found yourself having a hard time overcoming depression it is likely because it is complex and affects many aspects of your life. It is important to not rule out factors such as sleep and eating the right foods.

Meditate and pray if that works for you. Then eat a healthy meal afterwards, and go to bed :).

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Go Get a Therapist Already

Topics Discussed:

0:13 – Debating Getting A Therapist For Myself
0:39 – The Reality of Therapy and the Therapist’s Actual Job
1:30 – What Do You Have to Lose?
1:59 – Depressed Reasoning Stopping You From Getting Help
2:48 – Asking Directly for What You Need

I wake up again in the morning and feel alone.  Nobody wants to help me or hear about what’s going on.

I must suffer alone. As I go through my day, there is no chance I want to ever see a therapist.  All they are are shrinks.  They don’t know how to actually help me.

Plus, I had actually gone to one before. He didn’t cure me. I went to one session and came home still depressed….

Fast forward a few years…

I am in University and thinking about joining a support group but I’m nervous…  I’m the only one that really has depression and suffers as much as I do.

I join anyways, and can’t even express my feelings at all in front of the group because of how nervous I am.

Eventually, the therapist slowly nudges me.  It’s been a couple months since I join the group, but that day he nudges me in a way to where I decide to share…

The group acknowledges me.  Suddenly there are 4 people who have felt the exact same thing.

Whaaaaat.  Other people feel the same way too?

At the end of the year I have two close friends come from that support group.  I still maintain contact with the therapist years later.

I had so many realizations about incorrect thinking I had that the change in myself is immense…

Fast forward another few years…

I have no problem asking for help.  I see therapists for what they are, people to help me help myself.  I actively seek help when I need it and feel no shame what-so-ever.

Why is it that when I was in the depths of my depression, I felt so unsure and afraid of asking for help?  I felt like I shouldn’t ask for help.  Why?!

Ignore Everything You Have Heard about Seeing “Shrinks”

I wish I never had the weird belief that seeking help was weak and wrong.  I would have been able to start fixing my depression much sooner.

Everything you have ever heard in the media or from your friends about getting help or seeing a psychologist is crap.

Yes there are a handful of therapists out there that you won’t connect with or don’t know how to actually help you.

But there are some great therapists out there.

There are two therapists that came into my life to where my life would be completely different today if they hadn’t.

One of them I still email all the time.  Even when I am on the opposite side of the earth, I am still emailing him and getting support.

How to Actually Benefit From Therapy

Thinking that seeing a therapist is stupid is crap.  But also thinking that going to therapy once will cure everything is crap also.

Some people may have already tried therapy and deemed it worthless because they went to a session or two and were still depressed.

I know, because I was one of those people.

The thing with therapy is these people aren’t there to magically cure all the problems you experience..  They are there to help you solve your problems.

The therapist in my support group I talked about earlier in this post was amazing at seeing how I didn’t think I could ask directly for what I wanted.

He would nudge me in uncomfortable ways to share with the group.  When I would give some bullshit story or answer he would call me out for it.  He would ask me why I thought I couldn’t ask for what I needed.

It was such a different experience for me to learn how to ask for exactly what I wanted

I went from beating around the bush with every issue I had to being able to (nervously) walk in and say, “I actually don’t want any advice from any of you today.  I just want you to listen to me for a few minutes.”

I even walked in once and said, “I just need a hug from every one of you.”  Or even better, “I feel extremely nervous asking for some reason, but I just need a hug.”  That kind of stuff was extremely scary for me.

Don’t go into a therapy session thinking that that person is going to cure you, but go in there knowing what you need from them that is going to help you do it and ask them for that.

The biggest benefit I gained from therapy wasn’t quite the perspective the therapist brought to the table, but finally being able to take my wellness in my own hands and being able to ask directly for their perspective when I needed it.

The therapist might nudge you a bit.  Therapy sometimes brings out negative and difficult emotions.  It can be really uncomfortable at times.  That discomfort is what you need to feel to move forward in the right direction to finally become healthy again.

They will actually listen to you so you can express yourself fully.  Trust me, if you are depressed and no one in your life really understands what is going on, “sitting on a couch” while someone listens is invaluable.

If you are depressed They are going to provide you with an outside perspective so you can see things from angles you couldn’t see from before.

Go into therapy with that attitude.  They are going to help me help myself and I can ask for exactly what I want.  Go see a few different therapists until you find one that works.  Ask them if they can meet for 15 minutes to see if you click.

Go Find a Therapist TODAY

I am basically writing this as if I was addressing my past self.

Why are you debating getting help?!

Quit thinking about it.  Quit analyzing it and wondering if it will actually help you.  Just go try it and see!

Years and years of my life were spent feeling like I was worthless.  Years and years of my life I felt horrible and felt even more horrible about trying to get help for feeling horrible.

There is no point in not getting the support you need.

What do you have to lose?

• An hour or two of your time?
• $60?

What do you have to gain?

• Mental wellness?
• Possibly an invaluable connection with someone that cares about your success?
• The support and fuel to finally move you towards actually curing your depression?
• To not feel the way that you do for the rest of your life?
• To learn how to finally ask for help, a skill that is going to carry on for the rest ofyour life?
• Mental wellness?

 

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What Bungee Jumping Can Teach You About Depression

Topics Discussed:
0:14 – Supplements I Took Before Bungee Jumping
0:38 – What I Experienced Jumping Off the Platform
0:50 – Skydiving Years Ago When I Was Depressed
1:26 – The Day I Realized Depression is Real
2:01 – Bungee Jumping Compared to Depressed
2:34 – Keep Trying New Things to Fix Your Depression

No I am not going to tell you to go bungee jumping to fix your depression.

Bungee jumping doesn’t fix your depression anyways.  It might fix sadness, but not depression.

How I Told a Multimillionaire He Was Wrong About Depression

I recently attended a large business event.  One of the speakers was extremely successful and well established.

We find ourselves in the elevator together and start talking while we go to eat lunch at one of the best buffets I’ve ever had in my life.

As we were walking, we started talking about this website and how I want to help people cure their depression.

He tells me how he has gotten depressed a few times and I began to start my story about skydiving.

He cuts in and says, “Oh yeah! Whenever I start to get depressed, I just go skydiving or do something crazy and it solves it.”

I say, “No, that isn’t depression then.”

And he responds, “No! It’s true! Research shows that doing something like skydiving elevates your dopamine levels hours afterwards.”

I then proceed to tell him my skydiving story…

The guy is awesome and there is absolutely nothing wrong with what he said… But this is just one more case of people misunderstanding the word “depression“.

Depression Is Not “Sadness”

We need to create a new word for depression.  So many people confuse sadness or feeling down with depression.

If you feel down for a few days, you are not depressed.

Depressed is feeling like crap for weeks, even months at time.  Depression is feeling like shooting your head off for months at a time.

There is a massive difference between feeling down and wanting to blow your head off.  That is where a lot of misunderstanding about depression comes from.  There is a wide range of states along the depression spectrum.  You don’t necessarily have to want to blow your head off with a shotgun to be labeled as depressed.

But depression is a state of mind that you cannot get out of for at least a few weeks.  And it can’t be solved by jumping out or off of high things.  That is why it is depression in the first place. Depression IS not being able to enjoy those things.

Skydiving Did Nothing For My Depression

Go back about 5 or 6 years.  I have a Yamaha R6, a motorcycle that you will instantly be liable for a reckless driving ticket just by twisting your wrist a few centimeters.  I drive it around going above 100mph every time I ride it.

I hit corners so fast it feels like my bike is an ice skate capable of cutting into the asphalt and maintaining traction where ever I go.

I chase adrenaline wherever I go.  At night on the highway I race other bikers just to see who’s bike is faster.

When I get home the hairs on my arm are all sticking up because of how fast I was going.  I could barely even make the corners while staying in the same lane because of how fast I am going.

I’m still depressed.

 

I participated in all sorts of crazy extreme sports.  I played ice hockey where in my championship game someone got knocked out cold and sent to the hospital.

I mountain bike with my friend who is way beyond my skill level and hit jumps I shouldn’t be hitting.

I ride dirt bikes in the sand dunes as fast as I can.

I start hitting the biggest jumps I can find at the ski resort on my snowboard.

I have this weird belief that this is what I need to do to cure my depression… yet….

I’m still depressed.

So back to the multimillionaire.  About 6 years ago I am training to be certified in skydiving so that I can go on solo jumps as much as I want… to fix my depression.

It is all good and fun, and I think everyone should go at least once, but the fourth time I jumped, something happened.

Depression is a State that You Are Trapped In

On the drive to the skydiving place, I feel nothing.

On the way up in the plane, I feel slight nervousness.

I jump out the plane with my own shoot… I free fall for almost a minute.  I pull my shoot, glide down to the ground, turning perfectly into the wind and pulling on my chute at just the right time.

People run up to me in excitement, but slowly their excitement turns to an awkward surprise.

When they ask me how it was, I shrug, “it was ok.”

I didn’t enjoy any second of that jump and was almost even more depressed on the drive home.

When I got home, I realized, “I just went skydiving and I still feel like pure shit. I think I have depression.”

You think?

Depression was a state of mind I was stuck in that was blocking me from feeling pleasure from even the most extreme experiences.

That is the day I realized just how real depression is. I had depression and I needed to do something on a deeper level than just ride fast motorcycles and jump out of planes.

Bungee Jumping While Not Depressed Is Awesome

So instead I started bungee jumping and that solved everything….

Just kidding.

Flash forward to now.  I went bungee jumping with my Vietnamese friend in Thailand.

The night before I was still adjusting to the time zone difference, so I took an L-Tryptophan at night and in the morning I took an L-Tyrosine.

As we are driving to the spot, I am nervous and excited.

As I am buying the ticket, I start to feel surges of anxiety and excitement.

I’m going up the crane and I feel so nervous I am legitimately worried that I am going to pee myself.

I jump off the platform as the employee counts to three in Thai and fall towards the water at the bottom in what must have been one of the most adrenaline surged experiences I’ve had in a while.

Afterwards I’m elated and excited, replaying the experience in my head.

On the drive home, that’s when I realized I had fixed my depression for real.  I wasn’t just running from my negative states trying to surge myself with the craziest things out there.

I had fixed my depression through repairing my brain and body on a deeper level with vitamins, minerals, amino acids, and healthy food.

I felt so grateful looking back comparing my experience with jumping out of a plane and feeling nothing to jumping off a small platform where I felt everything.

If you haven’t yet fixed your depression and haven’t taken a deeper look into nutrition and supplements, then do it now.

P.S. If you liked this post, please let me know if something about my journey with nutrition and supplements would be interesting.  I am contemplating writing a book or course on it, but I only want to create something if it will be valuable to people.

 

17

If You Don’t Remember This Fact You Will Stay Depressed

Topics Discussed:
0:46 – Traveling Abroad While Depressed
1:30 – Depression Forces You to Be Healthy
1:52 – Not “Believing” We Have to Take Care of Ourselves
2:30 – Trusting Yourself VS Other People’s Opinions
3:01 – Summary of the Truth

I land in my layover in Beijing China.  I have a whole bag full of supplements.

I’m serious.  NOTHING but supplements.  And pretty much every single one is brand new.

There’s quite a bit of money invested in those supplements, and some of these aren’t the easiest to find in other countries.

From my hometown security to finally making it over to China, for some reason I haven’t been stopped and questioned about all my supplements.  But each time, security gives me anxiety.

A lot of the critical supplements, like magnesium, I need for my depression.  A lot of the other ones are brand new so that I can try them out and report back my findings to this site.  To lose the bag of supplements would pretty much be a disaster for my entire trip.

So far so good.  Except this time in the security checkout in Beijing the lady stops me.  She points at my bag and goes, “Uh, lots of pills!”

Uh oh, what now.  There is a language barrier so I act confused (not knowing the language lets you get away with a lot). I look at her like I don’t understand her.

She repeats herself, “Lots of pills!” and starts to get up and walk towards me.

I just say, “I have depression.  Need pills!” and give her the thumbs up as I grab my bag and start walking away.

No one follows me or stops me, so I’m in the clear.

Overcoming Depression Means Taking Better Care of Yourself

You don’t have to carry random experimental supplements with you when you travel to other countries like myself.

But if you have depression, sometimes it is a pain to have to take extra care of yourself.

Everyone else is staying up late, eating garbage, getting hardly any sleep, and working 10 hours the next day and feeling positive.

With depression you eat a couple crappy meals, miss out on your sleep for a day, and you find yourself drifting back into the depths of despair.

Even worse, people around you will give you resistance to taking better care of yourself or commenting on your habits.

If you’re young, you will hear, “You should have energy all the time at that age!”

Keeping Up Your Health Habits is a Must

Over and over again I will start to believe that I am just like everyone else and can let things slide.  Over and over again, that leads me to another depressive cycle.

You have to accept that you are more prone to negative states than other people.  You have to accept that taking care of yourself, taking your vitamins,  and eating healthy food is ESSENTIAL to keeping you where you need to be.

I used to be known as the “lentil guy” at my work.  While people were eating hamburgers and french fries, I was the guy that was eating lentils, vegetables, and protein shakes.

People would make fun of me, but I knew from the many relapses of depression that this is the way I must live.

Does this suck?  Is it bad to have to be making healthy food for yourself all the time?

The Benefits of Depression

I don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, eat sugar, or stay up all night.  I eat huge salads full of vegetables and healthy protein, drink lots of water, exercise almost everyday, and get plenty of sleep.  Not to mention I take vitamins and minerals and have even gotten a blood test to make sure all my levels are aligned.

This makes it so I’m not depressed.

But this also makes one of the healthiest people around.

When my coworkers were tired and ready to end the work day, I was still booming with energy.

When other people are getting fat or complaining about their health, my body is in good shape.

When other people are wasting their lives away drinking Bud Light every night, I’m having a good time and waking up feeling awesome the next day.

I have learned so much about living life and how to be healthy from my depression.  I would have never given myself that education if I didn’t feel like killing myself without it.

Ignore Everything Else and Realize that Depression Is Real

I wish I would have just accepted that I had depression and that it was real many years ago.  Instead I kept listening to all the crap from other people thinking it was all in my head, that I could just think positive and it would go away, and that I could eat whatever I wanted and feel fine at my young age.

Depression is real and that means you gotta take better care of yourself then other people.

After a while of being the “lentil guy” people stop bugging you once they see you are firm in your decision and don’t feel the need to have to explain anything.

The good thing is after a few months of getting your body and brain back into balance, you actually can go out and get drunk and eat McDonalds and feel fine the next day.  There are also a few supplements you can take that will ease things and make it so you don’t have to be so bulletproof.

But when you are recovering from depression and getting everything back into order, you have to take much better care of yourself than anybody else.  This might suck, but once you get rolling with being super healthy all the time you will never look back.

Remember, depression is real.  Don’t let the media or anything else convince you otherwise, and keep rocking those vegetables, exercise, and sleep!

0

You and Me by Debbie Sesula

Topics Discussed

0:24 – Do You Do This To Yourself?
0:44 – Does Being Tired Mean You Are Depressed?
1:01 – Does Being Overly Excited Mean You Are Manic?
1:29 – Take a Step Back

This poem illustrates the frustration that a lot of people who have mental health problems have experienced. It is aimed at helping people understand others.

However, I find that the real power in this power is how I relate to myself.

by Debbie Sesula

If you’re overly excited
You’re happy
If I’m overly excited
I’m manic.

If you imagine the phone ringing
You’re stressed out
If I imagine the phone ringing
I’m psychotic.

If you’re crying and sleeping all day
You’re sad and need time out
If I’m crying and sleeping all day
I’m depressed and need to get up.

If you’re afraid to leave your house at night
You’re cautious
If I’m afraid to leave my house at night
I’m paranoid.

If you speak your mind and express your opinions
You’re assertive
If I speak my mind and express my opinions
I’m aggressive.

If you don’t like something and mention it
You’re being honest
If I don’t like something and mention it
I’m being difficult.

If you get angry
You’re considered upset
If I get angry
I’m considered dangerous.

If you over-react to something
You’re sensitive
If I over-react to something
I’m out of control.

If you don’t want to be around others
You’re taking care of yourself and relaxing
If I don’t want to be around others
I’m isolating myself and avoiding.

If you talk to strangers
You’re being friendly
If I talk to strangers
I’m being inappropriate.

For all of the above you’re not told to take a
pill or are hospitalized, but I am!

This represents the stigma people often feel by other people.  But what about your own thoughts?

Are you doing this to yourself?

Sometimes it’s us labeling ourselves. When you get excited do you think you’re getting manic? On a day that you are sad do you think you have depression?

One of the most important steps for me in my recovery was when I started to distance myself from the definition of depression. If I really do get depressed, I can see it.

If I label any form of sadness that arises as depression that starts a downward spiral.

Obviously there is a fine line between isolating yourself out of depression and isolating yourself because you want to be by yourself. Being able to recognize which one it is can free you of limiting thoughts.

Not only can you rise above depression, but once you do, keep going, and be careful about labeling every mood change as related to your “diagnosis.”

7

NOW Foods Mood Support – An Honest Review

The great thing about amino acids and natural supplements is often times when you get back on track you don’t need them anymore and there is no withdrawal. After taking NOW Foods Mood Support for almost a month, I don’t have to take it everyday anymore. I take it every now and then when I need it. It helps bring me back to where I need to be, and then I can coast without it and still feel great.

Topics Discussed:

0:23 – Getting High Off Mood Support
0:41 – Ingredients in Mood Support
1:04 – Calm Confidence
1:42 – Pros and Cons
2:14 – Who Should Try It

I’ve had a consistently positive mood. Not just mediocre, but actually positive and optimistic.  Along with great sleep, eating healthy, and exercising, I feel great.  I actually had the time of my life the other night just playing a ping pong tournament, meaning those pleasure chemicals were working away!

I take a St. John’s Wort in the morning and NOW Mood Support at night.  I always swore I could feel something with the Mood Support, but you never know if it is a placebo or not.

I didn’t take it for two days and continued taking just the St. John’s Wort alone (Mood Support has St. John’s Wort in it).  Instead of taking one St John’s Wort in the morning and a Mood Support midday, I replaced the Mood Support with another St. Johns Wort.  The first two days I was more irritable, less friendly, and more negative.  On the third day I was noticeably depressed.  Even after a heavy weight lifting session I was becoming cynical.  It’s that feeling where everyone rubs you the wrong way and you are slightly angry for no reason.

On the third day I popped one capsule out of my Mood Support bottle  before I ate any food and continued on my day.  About a few hours later, I noticed I was calm and had generous feelings.  I regained that calm sense of confidence, had less anxiety, and was more  motivated.

I can tell you 100%  that this supplement has an effect on me, and it works regardless of whether or not I take it with food.  In fact, I accidentally got high off the supplement when I took a larger dose to test if it was a placebo or not.

Amazon Reviews

I’m always skeptical of Amazon reviews.  There are  people who are paid to write reviews.  If you look at the best sellers, the first 4 or 5 reviews are generally written like a sales letter or marketing message.  It can be hard to tell which reviews are legit.

When looking at NOW Moods Support, it has 23 Five-Star Reviews.  There is 2 One-Star reviews and a handful of Two- and Three-Star reviews.  Most are reviews that say “Amazon Verified Purchase” which is what convinced me to buy it in the first place.

For some people it worked amazing, others it didn’t work at all, and a few people it worked for a few weeks and then stopped working.

In other words, we know it works for some people.

Ingredients

B-Vitamins

There are accounts of people curing their depression solely by taking large doses of B-Vitamins alone. B-Vitamins are involved in numerous processes within the body and brain, among them being responsible for being the catalysts for converting amino acids into neurotransmitters like serotonin. The B-Vitamins in Mood Support at the very least will provide your body with greater nutritional value, and at the most will assist your brain in the process of producing more of the neurotransmitters that will aid your mood and make you feel better.

All B-Vitamins help the body produce energy. B-Vitamins are water soluble, meaning that if you take too much your body can excrete the excess without it becoming toxic.

Thiamin 4mg

Otherwise known as Vitamin B-1, thiamin can have anti-stress effects on the body.  It strengthens the immune system. It cannot be produced by the body and needs to be eaten regularly.  The nervous system needs a sufficient supply of thiamin to function.  Without it the brain doesn’t work right, the heart can enlarge, and it can cause digestive problems such as constipation.  A deficiency in Thiamin can cause depression.

Niacin 25mg

I’ve taken niacin before to help detox and feel good.  I’d take the kind that gave me the “niacin flush.”  I strangely noticed that every time I took niacin, I felt more relaxed, and on a few occasions, it actually brought me out of my depression by taking niacin alone.

25mg is just enough to help your brain metabolize amino acids into feel-good neurotransmitters without even getting close to giving you the often uncomfortable “niacin flush.”  Niacin is Vitamin B-3 and is involved in helping convert Tryptophan into Serotonin.

Taking niacin can give people a feeling of relaxation and ease.  It is had been studied extensively and used to even cure disorders such as schizophrenia, such as outlined in the textbook Orthomolecular Psychiatry by Linus Pauling and David Hawkins.

Vitamin B-12

If you search “Vitamin B-12 Depression” in Google you get a plethora of results.  A study conducted by the Linus Pauling Institute of Oregon State University showed that up to 30% of people who were hospitalized because of depression had a Vitamin B-12 deficiency.

Vitamin B-12 has many functions within the body, including making our genetic material and producing red blood cells.

Pantothenic Acid

I take pantothenic acid every day to help with acne.  I used to get acne all the time, but when I cleared up my diet and started taking pantothenic acid after I read all the rave reviews on amazon, I haven’t had an acne problem since.

Is it because of the Pantothenic acid?  To be honest I wouldn’t be able to say.  Corellation doesn’t prove causation.  All the reviews on Amazon.com says it has helped other people with their acne, but acne aside pantothenic acid is Vitamin B-5 and acts as an antioxidant.

Pantothenic acid is responsible for the production of several enzymes and breaking down carbohydrates, fats, and proteins.  It affects many aspects of functioning and can improve the immune system and reduce stress levels.

Minerals

Magnesium

I don’t even know where to begin with magnesium.  It plays a massive role in the body.  I probably didn’t even get close to giving it enough credit in my sleep post.  Just look at all the results that come from searching “magnesium depression“.  In Amazon there is a huge array of books with 5-Star ratings about curing depression and anxiety with the use of magnesium alone.

I’ve used magnesium to sleep which has done wonders for my depression.  Actually, I just ran out of magnesium a week ago and I like it so much I ordered 3 different kinds just to test which one is the most effective.

Magnesium is a vital nutrient that is often deficient in our modern diet. Magnesium deficiency could cause depression, behavioral disturbances, headaches, muscle cramps, seizures, ataxia, psychosis, and irritability.

If you aren’t sure if you are deficient in magnesium, this is a mineral you have to try.

Zinc

Zinc is involved in over 100 enzymatic reactions throughout the body.  In the 1920’s health practictioners started experimenting with zinc  to see how it affected people mentally and emotionally.  It is critical for maintaining  effective neural communication in the body.

Manganese

Manganese helps reduce fatigue, can improve memory, and is important for proper food digestion.  Manganese works with all the B-Complex vitamins to combat depression and anxiety.  This means that putting this in with all the B-Vitamins listed above helps everything work together more efficiently to defeat your anxiety and/or depression.

Amino Acids and Herbs

St. John’s Wort Extract 450mg

I’ve used St. John’s Wort with great success in helping beat depression. One problem with taking St. John’s Wort is it can make some people sensitive to sunlight and in certain cases you have to be careful not to eat certain foods like fermented cheese and drink beer. I’ve never personally had a problem with sunlight and eating a variety of foods while taking St. John’s Wort but your body may react differently.

Holy Basil Extract 100mg

I take this at night to help me sleep.  Great for anxiety control without affecting your brain neurotransmitters like traditional drugs.  It is an adaptogen and doesn’t seem to cause dependence. I used to bring some to my work when I first started. Whenever I would get stressed or had anxiety, I would take one and it took the edge off the anxiety.

Valerian Root 50mg

I keep a vial of this handy in case I need extra assistance to fall asleep.  It is also amazing for when you wake up in the middle of the night.  If I wake up in the middle of the night, I simply walk to the kitchen and put a third of a dropper of Valerian Root in some water and it puts me back to sleep within 10 minutes.

I’ve also used this a few times before going out at night if I have weird anxiety for no reason.  It is great for curbing anxiety, and 50mg is just enough to take the edge off of your anxiety without having a large psychological effect.

5-HTP 20mg

5-HTP is converted into serotonin.  This is especially awesome if your depression is linked to low levels of serotonin.  If you have ever been on an SSRI, 5-HTP is worth a shot. It was one of the first amino acids I started experimenting with and it helped me get off of my antidepressant.

GABA 250mg

This is the neurotransmitter that calms your body down, [get more info!]

Taurine 125mg

Taurine has been used as a natural way to alleviate anxiety and stress. Some people have had success with using taurine to combat insomnia. Taurine is the sort of amino acid that can help you unwind after a stressful day at work.

L-Theanine (Suntheanine) 50mg

L-Theanine is found in Green Tea.  It is why when you drink Green Tea, the caffeine makes you alert and productive yet you don’t get jittery.  Some people take L-Theanine by itself to curb anxiety or to help them sleep.  Suntheanine is the best kind of L-Theanine.  Some people claim it is the only kind of L-Theanine that works.

How to Take

Mood Support is basically an army of ingredients that will work together to curb your anxiety and depression.  How I take it is I take regular St. John’s Wort in the morning, then I take a Mood Support mid-afternoon with food if I need it. I don’t need to take it everyday anymore, I only take it when I need it.

Pros and Cons

That is a  LOT of ingredients in it, so if you happen to be sensitive to just one, it might not affect you positively.  It has 16 ingredients total.  It looks like they just threw a big cocktail of ingredients that could make you feel good in there and hoped for the best.  If you haven’t experimented with the supplements individually it may be hard to tell which one is giving you a boost.  Before I bought it I thought it would give my brain an overload.

It has B-Vitamins AND 5-HTP in it.  Some people believe that if you take B-Vitamins with 5-HTP, it causes the 5-HTP to be metabolized in other areas of your body before reaching your brain.  People say that it is converted into serotonin in your stomach or even your heart.  However, I haven’t seen any credible study that claims this is the case, only posts on forums which can always just be opinion.  If you take it with food, I highly doubt there is any risk, especially since it is a low dose (only 20mg) of 5-HTP.

Tt’s hard to tell if this would work if other areas of your life aren’t handled yet.  I eat extremely healthy, exercise, and make sure to handle my sleep. A supplement will only take you so far if you are sleep deprived, chronically stressed, or in the middle of a divorce.  Again it is a supplement.  Definition of supplement: something that completes or enhances something else when added to it.

They are supposed to SUPPLEMENT what you are already doing. However, for me, it is the last step of the way to bring me to that state of positivity and enjoyment out of life :).

To Try or Not to Try

Should you take this supplement?  That is up to you. All I can say is it really did work for me, and I know it for sure. It’s hard to tell if a supplement will work, and I certainly have had my share of  duds.

Is NOW Mood Support going to solve all your problems? No, it won’t.  It puts me in the state of mind that allows me to be able to solve my problems, but I could still be depressed while on it if I didn’t take care of myself.  All I know is I get a distinct boost in mood to where things like basketball, ping pong, hanging out with family, etc. actually FEELS good. The sunset looks more beautiful, and in other words it takes me from the step of mild-depression to a positive mood. I approve of every single ingredient found within NOW Foods Mood Support and have taken most of them individually in the past in my pursuit of a stable mood.

For my particular brain, it works amazing.  It gives me a sense of calm confidence.  It doesn’t make me happy, but it gives me the ABILITY to choose happiness.  A more internal sense of happiness.

In a nutshell: It curbs my anxiety and helps give my mood a positive boost to where I can handle life.

With supplements it is hard to tell what will work for YOU and your body.  It took me a while of experimentation until I found this supplement.  You might order it and spend your hard earned money only to find out that it doesn’t work… But what if it does?

 

You can click HERE to order from Amazon or find it at a local store (I get about 36 cents if you order through my link).

105

My Secret Combination of Little-Known Supplements that Fight Insomnia and Help Sleep

After years and years of experimentation I’ve finally found two supplements that I take together at night that put me to sleep.  I wake up refreshed, relaxed, and they haven’t caused any dependence.  I also have a few other secret weapons in my arsenal if I need to bring out the “big guns.”  Needless to say, I’ve been getting consistent sleep for a long time now.

Listen to the audio or click the video to learn a method I found that puts me to sleep every night.

Download Audio

Topics Discussed:

0:16 – Sneak Peak at All of TJ’s Supplements
0:25 – First Two Supplements to Try
0:45 – What about 5-HTP?
1:13 – When You Wake Up In the Middle of Night
1:22 – Two Minerals to Help you Sleep
1:49 – What About Melatonin?
2:02 – Why You Need Darkness for These to Work

I suffered from insomnia for many years. To most people, saying “I haven’t been sleeping” usually triggers the response, “Go to bed earlier!”  The average person gets sleepy and well, goes to sleep when they haven’t slept.  But when you have depression and suffer from insomnia at the same time (which is amazingly common), it isn’t that easy.

Sometimes when I haven’t slept, it increases my insomnia!  My insomnia creates more and more insomnia, making me depressed, until I get trapped in a cycle of low energy but excruciatingly cannot sleep for the life of me.

Combining the Two Supplements Together

I haven’t seen this combination recommended anywhere. What I personally do is take a Holy Basil (which also goes by the name Tulsi) with either a high quality 5-HTP or L-Tryptophan.  The holy basil calms down the nervous system.  This turns off my thoughts and lets me “wind-down.”  Many people are able to fall asleep taking this little known herb “Tulsi” all by itself.  It shuts off the “fight-or-flight” response when we have too much stress.

Holy Basil

Several studies have shown that certain extractions of holy basil reduces corticosterone.  A reduction in corticosterone reduces the amount of stress on the body.  A lowered level of stress contributed to an improvement in mental clarity and mood. ¹

When I take it, I don’t really “feel” anything.  The only thing that happens is I become calmer and my thoughts don’t race as much.  A lot of the battle in falling asleep is when my mind is racing.  Taking Holy Basil curbs the racing mind and allows you to slowly fall asleep.

5-HTP or L-Tryptophan

5-HTP is the precursor to serotonin in the brain.  Your brain uses leftover serotonin to produce melatonin.  This means that if you don’t have any serotonin in your brain left over from the daytime, it probably will be hard to fall asleep.  This is why when you get depressed you paradoxically also do not sleep even though your tired.  Your body isn’t producing the right hormones.  Click here to view a medical summary of studies done on 5-HTP for depression and anxiety.

Taking 5-HTP and Holy Basil was the trick that did it for me.  When I take 5-HTP at night, it puts me in that deep, restful state where I wake up and feel like my body underwent some restoration unlike when I take over the counter medications or Ambien.

I recently ordered some L-Tryptophan to test out it in comparison to 5-HTP.  L-Tryptophan is converted to 5-HTP in the brain.  It is one step further away from the production of serotonin, but many people respond better to L-Tryptophan than 5-HTP.  When I take L-Tryptophan, the sleep appears to be deeper, it takes a little longer for me to wake up in the morning, and it seems to last throughout the next day in comparison to 5-HTP.  It is as if it is still working after I wake up.  If I take it at night the first half of the following day I almost feel as if I am on an antidepressant.  Actually, it almost makes me too calm.

I’d suggest 5-HTP first, then L-Tryptophan if you don’t respond.  Combine it with Holy Basil and you have the recipe for a great night’s sleep.  Make sure that you take L-Tryptophan or 5-HTP on a relatively empty stomach.  If you eat other high protein foods the amino acids will compete with Tryptophan or 5-HTP and you won’t get the desired effect.

The great thing about this combination is not only does it knock you out and you feel well rested, if you forget to take it one night it isn’t the end of the world.  The other day I simply didn’t feel like I needed it.  My sleep wasn’t as restful, but I still slept for a good 7-8 hours.  Yesterday I was extremely calm and ready for sleep, without taking anything, and slept like a baby!  Try and take Ambien every night for a week and see if you can sleep without it!  Not only that, but these supplements help people get off their antidepressants without going through harsh withdrawals.

What About Melatonin?

You may be wondering why I don’t just take melatonin if that is what those amino acids are converting into to anyways.  I don’t take melatonin because it doesn’t work for me.  I have taken it many, many times and it always seems to make me more depressed, not wake up feeling refreshed, or give me weird dreams where I keep waking up all night.

Some people respond well to melatonin, and I’d still suggest you try it, however I have seen several people become dependent on it.  Melatonin seems like it works best for a few days to reset your circadian rhythm, such as when dealing with jet lag, and then you should stop taking it.

The great thing about supplements such as L-Tryptophan is your brain decides how much melatonin to produce.  Actually, if you take L-Tryptophan your body can also use it to produce niacin, another relaxing B-Vitamin.  So taking something like L-Tryptophan lets your brain use it to produce niacin, serotonin, and melatonin naturally and in the right quantities.

Experimentation is key.  I prefer 5-HTP and L-Tryptophan because they calm me down, give me restful sleep, and give me a nice antidepressant effect when I wake up in the morning.

Take Them Together Only When Going to Sleep

Whenever you take something like 5-HTP, Holy Basil, Melatonin, etc. make sure you don’t take them until you are going to sleep or are turning the lights off.  Your brain produces the hormones and chemicals that put you to sleep when there is an absence of light.

If you take them and sit up staring at your bright computer screen, they probably won’t work.  As I’m winding down for the night, I take them with some water, lay down on my bed, and listen to some audio or turn on Alan Watts while I wind down in pure darkness. My room isn’t completely dark, so I put on an eye-mask and then earplugs when I know my body is about to go lights out.

I’ve got Holy Basil and 5-HTP/Tryptophan working in my body, my brain thinks it is completely dark, and after I’ve been seduced by the philosophy of Alan Watts the earplugs go in and I can’t hear anything.  Lights out.

If You Wake Up in the Night or Still Can’t Sleep

Valerian Root

Another tool I use is Valerian Root.  I do not know if the capsules work, but I went ahead and got the liquid version.  This is a great supplement to use if you need a little extra power to fall asleep or if you wake up in the middle of the night.  When I was first getting my sleep in order, for some reason I would wake up every night about 4 hours after I had fallen asleep.  I’d walk to the kitchen, put a little Valerian Root in water, go back to bed and fall asleep within a good 10 minutes.

Other nights when I have to go to bed early and I’m just not feeling it, I’ll throw a little Valerian Root in the water I use to gulp down the Holy Basil and 5-HTP/Tryptophan.  I’ve also successfully used Valerian Root to curb my anxiety before events like job interviews.  Make sure you don’t take it everyday, however, as some people can grow tolerant to its effects.

Calcium and Magnesium

If I really have to bring out the big guns, I take a couple calcium tablets with magnesium.  In the past I have actually had success with beating my insomnia using these two alone, and some people say you should be taking these every night regardless of whether or not you have insomnia.  They really help if you just need that extra little support, but I found for serious insomnia they just couldn’t knock me out.

I personally use Natural Calm Magnesium, the unflavored version.  It seems to absorb into the body better than other forms of magnesium.  If you choose to get a different brand, try to get anything that ends in “ate” such as magnesium citrate, carbonate, orotate, etc.  Magnesium oxide doesn’t absorb into the body efficiently.

I’ve had success in the past with popping two Calcium pills and a spoonful of Magnesium mixed with water.  Plus, they are essential minerals your body needs.  Most Americans are deficient in magnesium, so if you haven’t tried it yet, order some high quality magnesium and test it out.

Inositol Powder

Inositol is sort of a b vitamin and sort of isn’t a b vitamin.  I know, that sounds pretty confusing, and inositol is confusing.

It is involved in all your cells and vital to your liver functioning properly.  It has been shown to reduce anxiety and OCD in clinical trials.  It also helps with sleep.

It’s really safe to take with minimal side effects.  For most people, an effective dose for insomnia is 2 grams right before bed.

I wrote an entire article and review for inositol here.

What About Dependency?

After two weeks of using this method, I haven’t come across any sort of issues with dependency.  In fact, I’ve had the reverse effect.  Now that my sleep cycle has been stabilized and have I have serotonin pumping through my brain, some nights I don’t take anything at all and sleep great.  In the case that you find one supplement to stop working, you can always cycle it with another.  If both 5-HTP and Tryptophan work for you, take 5-HTP for a week or two then switch over to Tryptophan for a couple weeks.

Again, I can tell on a day when I am tired enough that I will sleep through the night.  On those days, I don’t take anything, and surprisingly, I still sleep!  One of the main realizations I had was this helped reset my sleep cycle so that I started naturally becoming tired at night with or without the supplements.  The side effect of them helping to defeat my depression carries over into the next day, resulting in a snowball effect of happiness and sleep.  Remember those times when you had a snowball of depression and insomnia?  This combination is the reverse.

Use This Method Now and Sleep Like a Rock!

First, try taking holy basil. Then 5-htp. Then Tryptophan if 5-HTP doesn’t work.  Then incorporate Valerian, especially when you wake up in the middle of the night.  Finally, throw in Magnesium/Calcium for a added firepower or to improve the quality of your sleep (or do this first, depending on your needs).

After you take it, darken the lights and go to bed.  If you must use your computer, use an app like Black Light for Mac or Flux for both Mac and Windows.  Many people love Flux.  I use Black Light because I can’t make the screen a really dark red so when I’m searching YouTube for an Alan Watts video it doesn’t mess with the production of my night-time hormones.

Obviously, make sure you aren’t eating any sugary foods or caffeine close to bedtime, as this can surely disrupt your sleep.  If you wake up in the middle of the night from being hungry, taking some Whey Protein, eating a scoop of Almond/Peanut Butter on a stick of celery, etc. before bed will keep you asleep.

Throw on an eye-mask (or darken your room if you can) pop in some earplugs (make sure you can still wake up to an alarm!) and get ready to sleep like a slab of granite.

Make sure you are following this simple chart:

You can buy sleep supplements through Amazon or a local health food store.  Just make sure that what you are getting is high quality.  I listed the ones I personally recommend below.  These are affiliate links, which give me a few cents if you click them and decide to buy (4% of $15 is $0.60).  However, I stand by these products and if that stops you from buying them, you can search for them in Amazon.com yourself or buy them locally and I won’t get a commission.

Amazon:

• Holy Basil – NOW Foods (5-Star Reviews) or Organic India (What I Used).
• 5-HTP – Jarrow Formulas Brand.  I’ve personally used several brands – this one works.
• Valerian Extract – Herb Pharm.  What I use, 5-star reviews.
• Calcium – Citrical 240 Count $20 or Citrical Slow Release $10.
• Magnesium  – Natural Vitality Natural Calm or Solgar Magnesium Citrate.
• Inositol – Jarrow Formulas Inositol Powder

So in other words, I need to take a *$%#load of supplements to sleep?

I only had to take all of those supplements until I got my sleep cycle figured out.  I was taking all of the above and I’d wake up once in the night and retook Valerian Root.  After a while of getting consistent sleep and escaping the cycle, now I usually only take one holy basil, sometimes nothing at all.

That is the great thing about natural supplements.  They don’t produce dependency like the strong sleeping medications out there.

What do I do if this doesn’t work?

The most important part is that you start to experiment to find out what works for you.  Don’t stop until you finally start sleeping!  Everyone should be able to sleep great.  It took me a long time of trial-and-error and giving up before I finally found what I had to do, it might be a much shorter journey for yourself.

Dave Asprey over at Bulletproof Executive lists these as his guidelines to restful sleep:

1. Eat a Bulletproof Diet.
2. Hack your nervous system to manage stress.
3. Upgrade your brain.
4. Install F.lux on your computer (it’s free).
5. Don’t exercise for at least 2 hours before bed.
6. Avoid bright lights and LCD screens at least 1 hour before bed.
7. Go to bed before 11:00 PM.
8. Track coffee, green tea, and chocolate consumption to see if they effect your sleep (this is where a Zeo becomes a necessity).
9. Cheat with biochemistry (use supplements).
10. Sleep on an earthing mat.
11. Run a current across your brain with a cerebral-electric stimulator, AKA, “electrosleep” machine.

If you aren’t ready to run an”electrosleep” machine current across your brain, you can also try other supplements such as GABA, Ornithine, or Chamomile tea.  The key is to start experimenting and see what personally works for you.  Does taking a hot shower before bed help you relax? Does a cold shower knock you out?  Does exercising late in the day keep you awake? What about just Valerian Root and Magnesium?  Can you read nonfiction before bed without your mind racing?  Play around with it.

I ordered a Light Box from Amazon to start using in the morning now that winter has started.  They are high powered lights that emit light at 10,000 lux, which sends the same signals to your brain that the sun does.  You can see in the link here what my honest thoughts are about using the light lamp that I bought.

References

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How Positive Thinking Drives You Into Depression

Ever heard “Think and Grow Rich”?

“Think positive and you’ll attract what you want.”?

People ever tell you, “Just be grateful for all the wonderful things in your life”?

That you are depressed because you are thinking too negatively about everything?

So why don’t you just change your thoughts then buckaroo?  Quit complaining and start being positive!!!

And you try.  And try.  Try a little more.

But you’re still depressed.

Why is this?  Why is it hammered into our heads over and over again that positive thinking will solve our depression problems? Are these people crazy or are we just mentally weak?  Morally incapable?  Deficient human beings with character flaws?

The problem has nothing to do with positive thinking.  The problem has to do with a misunderstanding of depression.  Most people think that depression is a matter of cognition.  It is all “in your head.”  And if you are depressed and believe that, you are in for a long frustrating ride. If depression isn’t caused by your thoughts than what causes it?

More on that in a minute.  But first let’s take a look at Amazon.com and some of the best selling novels when you search “depression.”  There is a great book by David Burns called Feeling Good that teaches cognitive therapy.

But, as a reviewer of the Feeling Good Handbook pointed out:

When your head’s on fire, the book “Feeling Good” is only going to make you feel worse.

This book was a great read–when I wasn’t depressed or anxious. In fact, I recommended it to my clients all the time. I even attended a great workshop by David Burns, who–by the way–is a fantastic presenter.

The problem is that the book was useless when I was suffering from severe anxiety and depression. I’m not knocking cognitive therapy. It’s highly effective–as long as a person’s prefrontal cortex is working. But when your body aches, you can’t eat or sleep, and you wonder how you’ll get through another minute without ripping your skin off, this book is not going to help you. Save Feeling Good for when you’re feeling good enough to focus on it!

When a person hears about positive thinking they go crazy with it. It usually begins with stuff like, “I’m awesome!” or “I’m a badass!” or “I am the most amazing delicious little dumpling that ever came out into this earth headfirst!”

Could repeating that over and over all day work?

Not if you are depressed.

There is a better way.

I found this person’s plea on Yahoo Answers:

I’m reading the Feeling Good Handbook right now, only halfway finished. it has some good stuff in it, but like other books I’ve read, it tells you that your thoughts contribute to your feelings…duh! but how do you get rid of these depressing thoughts…that is the million dollar question!

Positive Thinking Won’t Get You Out of a Deep Depression

Thinking positive is like using a supplement for weight loss.  When the nutrition and exercise is in place, the supplement can really help shed off those last few pounds.

But if someone is eating like shit and sitting on their ass all day, all the green tea extracts in the world won’t do a thing.

If someone is going to the gym two to three times a week, dialing in their diet, and allowing proper recovery, they have the foundation for weight loss.  These things will account for 80-90% of results.

This person shouldn’t even be worrying about raspberry ketones until they have the basic fundamentals.  The raspberry ketones by themselves won’t do a damn thing.

If you are in a deep depression one positive thought is not enough to change your brain chemistry.  Not only that, but isn’t thinking positive hard while depressed? Isn’t that a symptom of depression?!

I tried the Positive Thought challenge multiple times back when I had bad depression.  I even wrote extensively about it on an old blog that I had.  It was a lot of effort and just wasn’t sustainable.

Positive Thinking Requires Control of Your Thoughts

You can change your thoughts over time.

But consider this.

How many westerners sit down to meditate each day?

…read that again.

How many westerners sit down to meditate each day?

If we can’t even sit still on a chair and simply be aware of our thoughts for 5 minutes without being restless, how are we supposed to control our thoughts for the entire day when we are caught up in other activities?

If we can’t focus for 5 minutes in isolation, how are we going to focus for 18 hours on our thoughts when driving through violent traffic and working at our fast-paced jobs?

You Need to Change the State of Your Mind

Changing your thoughts can change the state of your mind…

But what about changing your state of mind to change your thoughts?

What if instead of trying to change our thoughts, we did something else that in turn affected our thoughts?

Lets look at the most popular method for treating depression in Western Society – antidepressants.

Antidepressants work because they change the chemistry and thus the state of our mind.  The most common antidepressant is an SSRI, which blocks the re-uptake of serotonin in our brain.  This means that our brain will have more serotonin floating around to use.  More serotonin changes our mood.

Changing our mood allows us to think clearly and think positively.

Suddenly we don’t feel like absolute shit.  Finally we are able to actually see the good in ourselves.

I took citalopram (Celexa) for a little over half a year and it definitely saved me.  At the time I needed it to lift the fog so I could simply function.  After a while, however, the effects slowly stopped working, but that is another story.

At the time no amount of positive thinking was going to fix the serotonin deficiency in my brain causing the negative thoughts in the first place!  It wasn’t until I took something that altered my brain that the negative thoughts began to fade to where I could see some light.

Fight or Flight Mode

Here is another great example of when changing our thoughts just isn’t possible.  Recently I spent many months of my life in fight or flight mode, aka “survival” mode.

The only thing I could think about was making the money I needed to survive.

Everything was a threat.  Everything made me nervous. I couldn’t relate to people anymore.

I literally could not escape that state no matter how much positive thinking I did.  I couldn’t relax using meditation or other methods like breathing.

I was in that state of fight or flight.

It wasn’t until I really took control of my financial life and taking supplements like Valerian Root to calm me down that I was able to escape it.  It wasn’t until I calmed down my “mind that was on fire” that I was able to start to use other techniques like positive thinking.

Once I started to finally ease out of that state, I started taking a few supplements, eating really healthy, and exercising again.

I finally tackled my sleep to where I was getting the rest I needed.

I began investing in my relationships and getting the support I needed from family and friends.

Now it is a totally different ballgame.  Changing my thoughts beforehand would not have worked. My mind was racing and there was nothing I could do.

But when I changed the state of my mind through nutrition and rest, my thoughts became more positive.

The idea that you can think yourself out of a deep depression is like telling a drunk person to think themselves out of being drunk.

What does it mean to be in the state of depression?

Imagine this.

You and your friend are sick of your jobs and Friday night finally hits.  Your friend comes home and surprises you with a nice bottle of vodka.  You don’t particularly like vodka but whatever, it’s Friday night baby!

Talking about your jobs you both realize maybe you have drank a little too much.  About 10 shots in you realize you are hammered.  You turn to your friend and say, “Think sober thoughts!”

Your friend is still going to be drunk no matter what he or she tries to think.

It isn’t going to happen.  Your friend is drunk.  The only way to get out of that state is to remove the alcohol from your friend’s body.

Why do people think depression is any different?

If you actually think that depression is different, look at the brain scan again at the top of the page. A depressed person’s brain is far less active than a not depressed brain.

If you have been hard on yourself because you feel like you have failed by trying to use positive thinking to cure yourself, take a step back.  Look at the brain scan again.  Sigh a breath of relief.

Now really think about what you need.

Ask yourself, “What is this depression telling me?”  Is another positive thought going to change an entire brain that has decreased activity? How is your food affecting you? Are you getting enough sleep? Are you focusing on the right actions? Are you getting the help you need?

Quit worrying that you are immoral or “weak” that you are depressed.  Use the depression as a signal that you need to take action in a certain area of life.

Maybe you are allergic to dairy and you’ve been drinking a half gallon of milk everyday and it is making you feel like garbage.

Maybe you need to use amino acids and vitamins to restore your nutrient levels so your brain can function again.

Do What it Takes to Feel Good

If you feel good, relaxed, and healthy, it is a lot easier to think positive.

When I feel that way I don’t even have to try to think positive –  it just happens on autopilot.

Again, I’m not saying you shouldn’t learn the cognitive aspect of depression.

But if you’ve already learned it and are still depressed, there are many other areas you can tackle.  Don’t give up because you “failed” at positive thinking.

I’ll make every negative thought red and every positive thought black.

When I’m feeling depressed my thought process looks like this, “I should’ve done way more yesterday.  I probably won’t ever amount to anything.  What’s the point if we are all going to die anyways? Joe is annoying, plus he dribbles a basketball weird as hell. Money is evil.”

When I’m feeling good, my thoughts become, “I’m awesome.  I’m feeling great.  I wanna call Joe and take advantage of his weird basketball dribble.  I want to travel.  I’m worthless.  I want to start a business.  I think I might go for a run tomorrow.”

Did you catch the negative thought?  It is pretty easy to catch those thoughts and turn them around when there are few of them. As far as the first scenario, it is pretty hard to change a whole army of negative thoughts when you are deep down the rabbit hole of depression.

And if you ever felt a little weird trying to pump yourself up with thoughts like, “I am amazing,” I did too.

Now I just stop and question the reality of statements.  “No girl would ever want to date me.”  Is that true? Am I actually unattractive to ALL women? Even though this girl liked me, this girl liked me, and this girl liked me…?  Maybe some girls do like me… Glad I kicked Joe’s ass in basketball this morning.

The Solution – Take Action Towards Finding the Root Cause of Your Depression

Negative thoughts can be a symptom of feeling like shit.  Negative thoughts can make you feel like shit. Positive thoughts can be a symptom of feeling good.  Positive thoughts can make you feel good.

If you are depressed, you should be spending your time figuring out what the root cause of your depression is.  If you feel like crap everyday despite thinking positive, something else is wrong.

You need to see if you have any vitamin deficiencies.  You need to check your thyroid, sex hormone, and mineral levels.  You need to see if you have enough Vitamin D.

You can restore your neurotransmitters naturally with amino acids.  You can start sleeping again with natural supplements and by eating right.
And you can start waking up without feeling like your head is on fire.

You can change your state and actually fix depression instead of trying to think positive and faking like you are alright.

I hope you enjoyed this article and realize that positive thinking isn’t the big solution we make it out to be. If you’re struggling to find real advice on how to recover from depression without medication, click here to sign up for daily emails that give you truthful and actionable steps to feel like your old self again (plus a free bonus).